Ok y’all… This may be a strange or slightly uncomfortable topic to talk about, but come on, I know you have questions and so did we.
Growing up, I had know idea what “masturbation” was until like my Junior year of High School. I was talking with a group of friends in my high school and they had brought it up. You may be reading this and laughing at my naive mind or you are like me. Curious, but too afraid to ask.
Masturbation is “self-pleasuring, touching and rubbing parts of your body for sexual pleasure”
My friends were not believers and told me that it was a perfectly healthy and normal thing to do and I would say to an extent it is. Yet, I’d like to talk about some of the ugly destinations masturbation can bring us to.
The Bible doesn’t specifically talk about Masturbation, but it has a lot to say about purity. God has created our bodies with the ability to experience pleasure and there is nothing wrong with that. The problem comes when we allow our natural urges to drive our heart and actions to sinful places. Our “sexual drive” isn’t the enemy, it is where we choose for it to lead us to.
After hearing about masturbation for the first time, I googled it. I don’t recommend that, but I had questions that I was too afraid to ask the people around me. I was a Jesus follower at the time and something inside me felt weird by what my friends had said. In my searchings, I found that many blogs and health channels glorified the health benefits of masturbation. They said it helps with stress, knowing your body, and overall mood. Those all sounded great to me, but why did I feel this uneasiness about it all?
Nonetheless, I did it. They were right about the satisfaction side of things, but it became difficult to maintain the emotional release it gave me. In all reality, I was just touching myself to make me feel good and when I realized that’s all it was, I started to fantasize what that could look like with someone else. And friends, that’s where it went south. I would then feel so much shame. I felt unlovable, unworthy, frustrated at myself, and full of lust. These fantasies were consuming my mind and I chose to give into them.
Masturbation and pornographic content (whether imagined or seen) often go hand in hand. The graphic images and actions fuel the act. Research says that sexual fantasies accompany masturbation around 99% of the time. This creates a cycle. The Bible does not label the physical act of masturbation (that is, the solo kind) as a sin. It is not bad to touch yourself, but there are some critical questions to consider.
Is the act of masturbating tied to sexual lust?
If you have a habit of self pleasing in the form of masturbation, does this lead you into lust? Lust is “a very strong sexual desire for someone”. If you answered yes, I would say it would be wise to avoid masturbation. Creating fantasies or storylines in your head, while pleasuring yourself by masturbating is lust and can become very addictive. The Bible says:
1 Corinthians 6:18 says, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.”
Galatians 5:19 says, “Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality…”
It doesn’t say cautiously walk away from sexually immorality, but rather, FLEE! We can not tiptoe around this subject. We are no longer slaves to sin when we put our faith in Jesus Christ, therefore, we are called to something more.
Don’t get me wrong our feelings are not sinful in themselves. It is when we let these feelings lead us into sin, that we need to surrender.
If you have been masturbating with fantasies in your mind, I encourage you to consider what it may be doing to you. I know this is not a topic that is covered much and that it may be embarrassing, but that’s what we want to talk about. No question is too weird for God. If you’re struggling with this, please don’t keep it hidden.
Talk to God. Pray that God would renew your mind and help you have pure thoughts.
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
Remember who you are.
2 Corinthians 5:17
17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!